Sunday, June 08, 2014

Compassion - Not Only For Others

I recently reopened my set of "Goddess" cards.  Ok, yes, I do have a very convoluted belief system, but it works for me.  I spent too many years behind the scenes in organized religion to feel comfortable with being a mainstream Christian.  To me WASP stands for Wiccan-Anglo-Saxon-Person.

Anyway, one of the cards I drew last week was the Goddess Kuan-Yin and the lesson was Compassion.

Over the years, with all the downs in my life (and there are been several), I no longer snicker when I see someone's car broken down on the side of the road.  Been there, done that.  And the knowledge not only do you have not have enough money to repair the car, much less get it towed.  If I know I can't help, I at least offer a phone call and I sent them prayers for help.

People on the corner asking for money.  I no longer sneer as I drive by, feeling superior in my car.  Nor do I just ignore them.  I know I can't give something to everyone, but I at least mentally wish them well.  I have given pizza, because I spent my last $5 on pizza for dinner and can spare a couple of slices.  I have even given out a $10 because I felt sorry for the man and his dog.  I could be one of those people on the corner very easily, but for others in my life.

So, especially over the past few years, I think I find myself more compassionate toward my fellow woman.  But the thing that caught my eye was the "Release judgments about YOURSELF..." 

I can beat myself up in a heartbeat.  I'm not young enough any more, I'm not thin enough, I don't have enough money, I'm not/don't/can' get the drift.

At the same time I pulled the "Compassion" card, I also came across this paragraph in the book Making Art a Practice by Cat Bennett.  

"Sometimes we take stock of where we are.  We may be disappointed we haven't painted the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel or traveled to Tahiti.  If we lose our heads - and we will from time to time - we might find fault with ourselves.  We might think we've failed.  And we may well have failed to see who we are.  The Sistine Chapel simply doesn't have our name on it, but something does."

So, if I am willing to send positive thoughts to others, why can't I feel that same since of compassion toward myself?  So I need to be gentler toward myself. 

But a little mental yelling at spending too many hours playing games on Facebook is ok. 

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