Positive Focus Thursday - It Only Takes a Quarter

I am going to tell you a story. I'm telling the story, not to pat myself on the back, but to show how little it costs to be nice.

Now, 'nice' is not how I would describe myself. Grumpy, grouchy, curmudgeon...those I would use, but nice isn't one. Over the years (decades) I have discovered how little it 'costs' to just be nice. Saying hello, telling someone 'have a nice day', a 'thank you'...all those don't even cost a quarter. But anyway, my quarter story.

Two or three weeks ago I was at work and the next cashier over, a young woman was checking out. As I walked by I overheard the conversation going on and the gist of it was she was a quarter short buying her groceries. She was deciding what she needed to put back in order to pay for her food.

I normally don't have change in my pockets, but on this day I did. I paused, handed her the coin and told her 'don't bother putting anything back'. She thanked me over and over and said she would pay me back. My response to her was 'we have all been there' and 'have a great week' and I walked on. I think I was either headed for my break or getting off work and I didn't think anything more about it.

On Monday, as I was checking out customers, there was the young lady again. She asked me if I had gotten my quarter back. It took me a minute to remember what she was talking about. It seems she had come in several times, hoping to see me again, and personally hand me the quarter. 

With tears in her eyes, she told me how much it meant to her I had given her the quarter and how she had gone home, and in relaying the story to her family, had cried. And it still made her cry someone had been so 'nice', that I had helped her out without question. She hadn't expected anything like that to happen and it meant the world to her. 

A couple of incidental facts. She is a young African-American woman. I'm an old white woman. Two groups these days which seem to be moving further apart rather than closer. Those 'in charge' seem to be making it harder and harder to think of other humans as just humans and not someone to be put into a specific box and not someone another box of humans should associate with. Often I feel we are like a herd of cattle surrounded by wolves. Cutting out the weakest of the herd to do away with. 

I have come away from this experience with a couple of ideas reinforced. One, you never know what is going on in another person's life. Plus, we have all been there. It might not have been needing a quarter to pay your grocery bill. Or your electric bill. Or your rent. But we have all faced similar circumstances. we all know that sinking feeling and how it drags you down. And anyone who says they haven't been there...well, in my opinion, they are lying or in denial.

And this old cow is saying 'fuck you' to the wolves. I'm going to stand up for the weakest the best I can. I'm not going to let them win. I not going to let them pull me down into their muck and separate me from the rest of the herd. 

After all, it only takes a quarter.